So Totally Indecisive

I am one of the many people that lay in bed at night and think about anything and everything there is to think about until I fall asleep. I think about things like what the heck am I going to wear tomorrow, and who came up with the word doodle, and why is an orange named after its color. But recently my thoughts have been more serious. As some of you may already know, I am a senior in high school this year, and what are seniors’ focus? COLLEGE. Usually whenever deciding upon a college, your first thought is what in tarnation do I even want to do for the rest of my life?

Remember being asked as a kid what you want to be whenever you grow up? Our answers back then were pretty simple. I want to be a veterinarian, or I want to be a princess.. that was usually always my answer. But now if someone asked you that, a lot of us wouldn’t know what to say. Whoever can answer that question without even giving it a single thought because you’ve always known exactly what you want to do, bless your soul. Because I have been so indecisive!

It can sometimes be scary to be making these types of decisions at such a young age. But the reality of it is that we aren’t all that young anymore. Eighteen is the legal age of adulthood. Once you go to college, that is the start of a completely new chapter in your life. You are starting YOUR life. SO CRAZY TO THINK ABOUT! I don’t want to give off the vibe that college is terrifying and that the real world completely sucks, because it’s actually super exciting to be starting something new like creating your future!

So here is all of the thoughts that danced around inside of my head. Psychology, that was my decided major. One tiny problem.. It. Is. So. Broad. Anytime I would think about my major and do any type of research on psychology I would get very overwhelmed because new things would pop up each time. So I was always discovering new things I could narrow it down to. The problem was actually deciding for sure what I wanted to narrow it down to. “Ooh, I like that one!” or “No no, I like that one!”. See my problem? Everything was so uncertain and undecided. I have no idea what I would do with my psychology major.

My thoughts then began to travel elsewhere. I’ve crossed paths with the thought of being an elementary teacher. I know that being that people person that I am I would need a career that gave me the opportunity to be able to form relationships with people and use my personality to the best of my ability. I love kids, and I love the “nurturing feeling” of being able to talk with them and form relationships with them. Becoming a teacher is not something that is overwhelming and makes my brain swell whenever I think about it. It’s very simple. Not simple as in “its so easy to be a teacher”. But simple as in, it isn’t so broad to the point where I have no idea where to begin.

My next step is to continue to pray about it. I want to follow God’s plan for me, and glorify him with everything that I do. I hope that he leads me in the direction that I need to go. And I know that he will, because he always does! Trusting him is not always easy, but that’s what makes him so great, whenever he surprises us with the unexpected.


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